Christmas and hard liquor go hand in hand.
I hate to bring this here but it IS a Christmas blog, and this IS a Christmas issue.
Two words: Santa Claus.
I’m just not sure where I stand with him – not in terms of whether I’ve been naughty or nice (and I’m not asking for suggestions here, thanks), but in terms of what I will tell Kal about the jolly old man with a white beard.
I’m not really worried about it this year – Kal is too young to do the whole Santa thing. Although as I balanced him on my knee next to the Yankee Candle Santa a couple weeks ago, I did worry that my 18 month old might be mysteriously relating Christmas to the smell of vodka when he’s 18 years old.
I’m sure you’re not surprised by that cynicism, especially if you are familiar with my Scrooge-like distaste for all things related to Elmo, Disney, and Elisabeth Hasselbeck (and hey, might as well throw Walmart into that mix 
).
When I sum it up that way, it almost sounds un-American to be cynical about Santa Claus, doesn’t it? And maybe there’s some truth to that. I’m pretty sure Danny’s parents didn’t do the Santa thing while growing up in Portugal, and Danny himself will tell you that Santa was never a huge focus in his Christmases when he was a kid.
And clearly my childhood couldn’t have been that typical if it churned out a social deviant like me; I can also attest that Santa wasn’t a huge thing in our house either. I do remember making a list for Santa, leaving out cookies, and listening for footsteps on the roof, but I also remember thanking my parents for the presents that were signed with Santa’s name.
Maybe Santa wasn’t a huge thing for me when I was little because we also had an Advent wreath on our kitchen table to light each morning at breakfast, and Advent calendar hanging on the wall to count down the days to Jesus’ birth, rehearsals for the church Christmas pageant, and then a huge celebration on Epiphany Sunday (about a week after Christmas) when the Wise Men arrived in Bethlehem (actually, El Dia de Los Reyes – The Day of the Kings – is much bigger than Christmas in Latin America). Santa was just something extra, not the focus.
It’s not that I had a bad experience with the whole Santa thing. I just really love Christmas for what it is – a very special time of faith.
And no, I don’t have a bumper sticker on my car that says “Jesus is the reason for the season” or any other Christmas advocacy going on. I just feel a little ill when my eyes are assaulted with images of the fat man in the red suit while there are still Halloween decorations everywhere. I guess I’m rejecting the commercialistic part of it and trying to focus more on the Nativity part of it – which is nothing revolutionary or new of course, but now that I’ve got my own kid, I need to be sure of where I stand.
Like I alluded to before – I see Santa as being part of American culture. But there are lots of things in American culture that I don’t subscribe to, and America’s depiction of Santa Claus feels like it’s going to be right up there with Disney and Walmart.
And Danny loves the idea of telling Kal the truth and having him become “That Kid” who feels the need to blurt out, “Santa isn’t real, you know.” So yes, I do have a partner in cynicism-crime.
But idealistically, I’d like to focus more on Saint Nicholas, Papa Noel, the Magi, and the idea of Christmas tradition and folklore more than the typical mall-Santa mentality.
We struggle a little with this. Maybe a bit less, since Christmas is much more the original pagan midwinter solstice-type celebration for us. My (mild) problem with the concept is more with the dishonesty, I think.
Last year I was shopping with a friend and her four-year-old daughter, and somehow Santa came up. My friend said “But we know that Santa’s not really real… right? That Mommy and Daddy bring the presents?” And the child seemed so utterly dejected when she replied. It was rather sad.
Comment by Jennie — November 27, 2005 @ 7:16 pm
Mel, I think you must have been in my brain. I was going to post something very similar. Daniel is old enough this year to start picking up on things and I’m trying to figure out how to keep things “on message” so to speak. I’ve only come to separate the “real” meaning of Christmas from all the other superfluous stuff as an adult. We went to church, but didn’t really do much at home in terms of focusing on the reason that we celebrate Christmas is because of Jesus’ birth.
Comment by reindeergames — November 27, 2005 @ 9:52 pm
Jennie - you bring up a good point about the Solstice. When Kal is old enough to get it, I’d really like to make sure he knows what other people celebrate this time of year. I guess there’s Christmas, Hannukah, Solstice, and Kwanzaa, right? They’re all beautiful events in their own right, and I would love all that to be in the foreground, with Santa Claus just being a little fun-something extra.
I agree that the situation you described with the 4 year old girl sounded sad, and I guess that’s the sort of thing I’d like to avoid.
Suze - I didn’t think about it until I wrote up this post, but the whole Advent aspect of Christmas really was magical in itself. I loved lighting one more candle each week, and understanding the significance of the different colors of candles. And the calendar was a neat way to count down to Christmas while focusing on Jesus’ birth. I’ve been noticing Advent calendars and as cool as the Lego one looked, I really want to find a Nativity-themed one. Also, as I mentioned in my post, we celebrate Epiphany at our church (and the kids all get gifts) so as a child, I’d not only be looking at Christmas with excitement, but I also appreciated the whole 3 Wise Men part of it, which added more focus to the Christian part of it. Though I’m willing to bet that in 20 years, the 3 Wise Men will be commercialized in order to have another gift-giving holiday to market.
I did a lot of thinking while writing about Santa, and I think I’ve got a better handle on what I want to do, and thanks for your responses too!
Comment by mel — November 28, 2005 @ 1:52 am
In one word: AMEN.
We did write a Santa letter this weekend, but we will be doing St. Nicholas this year too. My kids are still a little young to understand all of it but we do read a children’s version of the nativity and will eventually talk about Jesus’ birth and all of that.
I hate it when we’re in public and someone tells my kids to behave or Santa won’t visit them! Gee thanks, Buddy. I’m sure strangers telling 2- and 3-year-olds that they aren’t even good enough for a make-believe person’s attention will do wonders for their self-esteem.
Comment by Echo — November 28, 2005 @ 4:22 am
Echo - that’s another thing that scares me - threatening kids with Santa. And the worst is when you hear something like that said in like August.
Comment by mel — November 28, 2005 @ 3:58 pm
Cora knows about Santa, but I don’t think she ever really believed that he’s real. LOL She was smarter than us from the get-go.
I can’t stand the santa threats either.
Comment by Amber — November 28, 2005 @ 4:51 pm